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Killam (Mulhall); Dorothy Evelyn

March 11, 2011 34 Condolences

Killam

It is with a deep sense of loss that the family of Dorothy Evelyn (Mulhall) Killam, of Liverpool, NS announces her passing, on March 6, 2011. Born in Liverpool to the late Edgar A. and Mary E. Mulhall, she died peacefully with her daughter Kathryn by her side, at Queens General Hospital, just two months short of her 98th birthday.

Dorothy’s growing up years were full and happy, filled with tennis, swimming, sailing, dancing, music and many friends. These were precious and memorable years, of which she has written many personal and historical stories for her local newspaper. She graduated from Horton Academy and entered Acadia University class of ’35, a time cherished, for the rest of her life.

She met and married the dashing and devilish Bill (William E.) Killam from Yarmouth, NS and not long after, the handsome young couple found themselves in the middle of a war against Germany and like everyone else, they pitched in ‘to do their bit’, Bill became an officer in the Merchant Navy, Dorothy joined the St.John Ambulance and for the next four years, they saw little of each other, savoring every moment and every leave that came their way..

Years later, she spoke with great pride of the work she did, especially when relaying the story of the hundreds of frozen and wounded soldiers brought ashore from a sunken war ship just off our coast, who were placed in schools, in Liverpool and nearby towns. “We sat with them night and day, bathing their frozen limbs, first in cold, then gradually warmer water…ours (Liverpool) were the only ones not to lose a limb”. Later, while stationed in Sydney, she became a VAD with the Red Cross, serving Sydney Hospital and the military hospital, as the head dietian.

Family was everything to Dorothy and the rest of her life was spent taking care of hers. She lost two, full term baby boys and raised two children, Kathryn Lyle (currently of Liverpool) and David Lloyd (Beamsville, Ont.), all the while caring for two elderly parents and a husband with early onset Parkinson’s Disease. These were demanding and difficult years, which she met with strength and style, as all who knew her will confirm.

Her ‘place of her own’, her sanctuary outside the demands of making ends meet and the care of others, was in music and she filled her heart and those of others with her powerful, beautiful metzo soprano voice. A member and soloist with the well-known Queens Chorale and also the choir at Zion United Church, she is still remembered as an important part of our musical heritage, here in Queens County.

Dorothy also had a ‘view of her own’, which often led her down new and socially unfamiliar paths of thinking. In the early 1970’s, she was one of the founders of our local branch of the Canadian Association for the Mentally Challenged, a founder and board member of the Drug Dependency and Mental Health Association, as well as the FISH Help Line.

A long time member of the Queens County Historical Association, Dorothy (and others) can take credit for saving the Fort Point lighthouse and for encouraging the RBC to rethink their ‘modern’ plans for their new bank and to build a replica of the original building instead. She was a member of the South Shore Literary Club and like her mother before her, loved literature and wrote poems, a few of which were published.

Dorothy was a life long member of the United Church of Canada and took on various roles, at Zion United Church. She served as a Member of Session, on the Board of Management, as an Elder, a choir member, to name a few. Always curious, always wanting to dig deeper, she was on several discussion panels and sought always to find something new in something old and accepted.

Despite the stresses and strains that life can offer up, Dorothy put her best foot forward and found much joy in living and the world around her. Her love of flowers and nature in all its forms, gave her great pleasure and for those who knew her well, she will live on in the sight of a bird flying overhead, in the scent of a delicate flower, in the sound of the wind, in the shape of clouds, in plants & shells washed up along the shoreline or simply in the way a piece of tall grass falls over and lands upon a rock. Mary Frye’s well known 1932 poem could have been written just for her.

Dorothy was a curious, courageous and compassionate woman. She had a quick mind and a wicked sense of humor right up till the end. She saw good in people, when others did not. She saw opportunities where others saw obstacles. She saw the importance of forgiveness and found the grace to forgive, where others still cannot. In her own small way, Dorothy made a difference in this world and for many, the world will be a much smaller place without her

Thank you to the folks at Stonehaven Lodge, Port Mouton, especially Tim and Gloria, who cared for Dorothy like she was family, often going way beyond what was expected and for making her last years, safe and happy ones. Thanks to all the homecare ladies and the V.O.N. who she came to know well. Thanks to cousins Randi, Shaune and Pat who kept vigil with her daughter Kathryn, each night until she passed on.

A celebration of Dorothy’s life will be held on Saturday, May 21st, at Zion Church, Main Street, Liverpool, at 2pm. Family and friends will gather to honour her life with a musical tribute to her days in the Queens Chorale and the church choir. Terry Hurrell, Robert Mills, Kris Snarby, Lesli  Chandler to name a few, will perform songs that Dorothy loved. A reception will follow at the church. Wildflowers, photos and memories are welcome. For information on how to make a contribution to the music festival in Dorothy’s name, please email klkillam@eastlink.ca



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Condolence Messages

  1. Ted Lavender

    March 11, 2011 at 6:50 am

    I am so sorry to hear of your great loss, Kathryn and family

  2. Karen Crouse

    March 11, 2011 at 7:30 am

    Kathryn, I am sorry to hear of your Mom’s passing. She was one of Liverpool’s grand ladies. She will be remembered for her unique style and talents. God bless you at this difficult time.

  3. Nancy Cameron Leach

    March 11, 2011 at 7:50 am

    Dear Kathy –

    I am so sorry for your loss – hold tight to memories for comfort.

    Most Sincerely,
    Nancy Cameron

  4. Deb and Chuck Sponagle-Taylor

    March 11, 2011 at 8:36 am

    Kathy, and to all those who Loved this gracious Lady, we send our Love and condolances . Dorothy , my (Mrs Killiam) was a wonderful Lady who made a difference in all the lives she touched.She touched my life way back when I was a little girl and I am so thankful to have gotten to know her again in later years.
    She lived a long life and was bright and beautiful everyday. A fine Lady, a kind Lady and a talented Lady who will never be forgotten. Like you said above , when ever we look at pretty flowers or hear a beautiful song ,we will think of this grand person .
    Keep strong Dear friend Kathy,
    God bless
    Deb and Chuck

  5. Linda Charlton

    March 11, 2011 at 9:42 am

    Kathryn,
    So sorry about the loss of your mother. From her beautiful obituary she sounds like an amazing woman, and one who is deeply loved. Surely the hallmark of a life well lived.
    Our condolences to you and all her family and friends.
    God bless,
    Linda and Malcolm

  6. Jim Gow

    March 11, 2011 at 10:20 am

    Kathy, my hearfelt condolences and a long distance hug….

    Jim

  7. Sandy Tonello-Greenfield

    March 11, 2011 at 12:25 pm

    Kate,
    I am so sorry to hear the news of your Mother’s passing.She was and shall always be remembered as a grand woman.Take heart in knowing she goes on in spirit.
    Be gentle as you let go my old friend.

  8. Grace Raynard

    March 11, 2011 at 1:27 pm

    My sincere condolences.

  9. Walter & Sherri Miller

    March 11, 2011 at 2:07 pm

    Kathy & David:
    We send our condolences to you at your time of loss.Your Mom certainly was a great lady.We knew her for years and she will always be remembered.by everyone she met and everyone who met her.I certainly enjoyed my visits with her.

  10. Tim McDonald

    March 11, 2011 at 5:23 pm

    Dear Kathyrn,
    So very sorry about your mom’s passing. She was an awesome lady. I first met her several years ago while going to the local museum and our common love of history made us instant friends. Her stories of yesterday were always so interesting and her mind always so sharp. I will always fondly remember the night you both visited me. She looked through my old photos of Liverpool and she shared many of her memories with us. She was definitely one of the best. I will miss her!

  11. Monica Roberts

    March 12, 2011 at 5:47 am

    Dorothy was one of a kind. I always enjoyed my home support visits with her. Sorry for your loss Kathy, you was her world. R.I.P. Dorothy <3

  12. Shirley & Paul Shot

    March 12, 2011 at 6:53 am

    Dear Kathryn and David: You were blessed with a caring and loving mother who gave of herself to so many. Her mark was definately left in our community. God Bless

  13. Geraldine Cunningham

    March 12, 2011 at 7:18 am

    Dear Kathryn.So sorry for your loss.Your mom made our wedding cake 48 years ago .No charge.A wonderful lady .God Bless

  14. jean fisher

    March 12, 2011 at 7:26 am

    my deep sympathy,kathy . i knew your mum when she was at the lodge,and i was visiting,,i go way back to knowing your parents ,when i came to canada they made trips to where i was living she was so kind ,in 1947 i had a child ,she brought a silver spoon to welcome her to the world ,,she was a special lady…..
    and will be missed by all ,,,,
    hold on to the lovely memories,,,
    jean fisher,,,,,

  15. Janice

    March 12, 2011 at 11:42 am

    Kathy….sorry for your great loss. Your Mom’s presence will be missed in the community she so loved, and the heavens have been blessed with another angel. Your warm, loving memories will live on for a lifetime.

  16. Jan Pottie

    March 12, 2011 at 1:04 pm

    Sometimes 98 years is not enough and I feel like I still have so many questions for Dot. Like where did she find all the wildflowers she picked and pressed to make a real Field Guide to All The Wildflowers of Queens County; does she remember how it felt when Henry Henzie Drive was named; what do I do when my bride doll’s head falls off, and would she like to hear Debbie (Grace) Raynard and me sing ‘Your Cheatin’ Heart’ just one more time? So many questions…what was it like before the mill? How do dance cards work? What did it feel like to have the vote? But mostly I’d like to thank her for letting me use her good glasses and sit in her living room and try to sing like Hank Williams…so thank you Dot, the good glasses are polished and here’s to you!

  17. Linda & Robert Trainor

    March 12, 2011 at 2:32 pm

    Dear Kathryn & family,

    So sorry to learn of your MOM/s passing. I was once part of a Bible Study group that we both attended. She was such a beautiful person, one who will be miss. Hang on to the memories. May God hold you all close to His heart in this time of sorrow.

    Linda

  18. Antoinette

    March 12, 2011 at 5:34 pm

    Dearest Kathryn,
    The distinguished quality of love between you and your Mother gave nourishment to your generous and vital spirits. It is a disposition that will not be denied by one’s passing for its strength will always remain loyal.

    “My mother would be a falconress,
    and I her gerfalcon raised at her will,
    from her wrist sent flying, as if I were her own
    pride, as if her pride
    knew no limits, as if her mind
    sought in me flight beyond the horizon.”
    (excerpt My Mother Would Be Falconress by Robert Duncan)

  19. Gary Saulnier

    March 13, 2011 at 3:25 pm

    Dear Kathy, and all who knew and loved Dorothy,

    I just want to express my deepest sympathy for you as you experience the great sense of loss that Dorothy’s passing brings. I too loved Dorothy. As a young boy she introduced me to the wonders of gardening and helped me to see the beauty in the simplest of things. She shared plants and seeds. I too became a gardener. As a young man spending many hours over many years in her company, in her quiet home, she listened carefully and showed patience and compassion as I struggled with self-esteem, identity and spirituality. She was always supremely non-judgemental, and encouraged the potential she saw in me. She listened avidly over many hours as I told her of my adventures in the world, of what I had experienced and learned – and perhaps she learned from me as well. Dorothy also told me of her life, and I too learned to listen. As a therapist, I listen, encourage, and offer perspective – wonderful and important lessons learned so long ago. In middle age I finally achieved the credentials to pursue a profession that truly enriches me. Dorothy expressed her delight and pride in my accomplishment. Dorothy was a cherished confidante and mentor. I know she was too humble to realize how much she gave me. I also know that as long as I live, and beyond my own life, Dorothy goes on. Her seeds of compassion and understanding continue to be spread by all of us who were fortunate enough to have known and loved her. Thank you, Dorothy. Thank you for everything.

  20. Robert & Sally Fader

    March 13, 2011 at 3:37 pm

    Kathy & family:

    So sorry to hear of your Mum’s passing. She was a fine lady and admired by many. I so enjoyed visiting her at Christmas time when Robert and I delivered cookies to her from Zion Church. We always had a great chat. I enjoyed watching the video and seeing the group tennis photo with her picture and my Dad’s (Reg). They were good friends way back. Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this very difficult time.

  21. john bain

    March 13, 2011 at 3:40 pm

    kathy, and david , so saddened to hear of your moms passing. my thoughts and prayers are with you .

  22. Pat Wigglesworth

    March 13, 2011 at 7:51 pm

    Kathy

    Sorry to hear of yur Mom’s passing, my thoughts are with you.

  23. Suzanne Atkinson

    March 14, 2011 at 6:54 am

    Kathy – it was a pleasure to have had an the opportunity to meet and know your mother. My thoughts are with you.

    Suzanne Atkinson

  24. darlene [joudrey] sewart

    March 14, 2011 at 9:11 am

    david and kathy
    i am very sorry to hear this news. i always liked your mother. what i especially remember is the day we cut up her brand new facecloths to make barbie clothes. she instead punishing us. she made us hot chocolate.
    a lovely person and lady.
    all our best to you and yours
    darlene and family

  25. Lynn Lavenderp[Westhaver]

    March 14, 2011 at 9:36 am

    Dear Kathy,
    So sorry to hear about your Mother,hang onto ALL of those memories.hold them tight!

  26. Karen

    March 16, 2011 at 12:32 pm

    Kathryn I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. I know the pain of that loss far to well. I’m thinking of you. xo

  27. Anne MacDonald

    March 19, 2011 at 9:59 am

    Dear Kathy,

    So Sorry to hear of your loss. Your Mom was a lady whom I have always admired.Her presence was always a welcomed experience. I’m thankful to have known her, and glad for the gift that she was to you. ….Always too soon ….
    Be good to you, there’s a special way in which she’ll always be there.

    Sincerely, Anne and Steve MacDonald

  28. Dale Saulnier

    March 31, 2011 at 5:32 am

    Thinking of you at this time Kathy. Your mother was a very special lady and I have wonderful memories of her from my childhood “across the brook” . She will certainly be missed and memories of her shall be cherished.

  29. paul and cathleen seamone

    April 5, 2011 at 8:11 am

    Our deep and sincere sympathies to you and your family at this difficult time.Take care Kathy, paul

    Sincerely,
    paul and cathleen

  30. Mitzie Kent

    April 10, 2011 at 6:12 am

    Wow….almost 98 years. Such a generous length of time to be apart of this earth and now she will live on through her children . What Joy the memories of her life will forever be to you all. I’m sure you have many unique stories. Thanks for sharing the story about your trip to Le Louvre in Paris with your mom…makes me chuckle out loud….Life is Great…so glad she did embrace it while she had time ….thinking of you as you go through these days ahead of transition. Processing it all is both sad and joyous I’m sure.

    Mitzie

  31. Rose Marie Verge White

    May 10, 2011 at 8:22 pm

    Dear Kathy I was so sorry to hear of your mothers passing, It is a great loss of a beautiful soul. God Bless

  32. Anna Cruickshank

    May 16, 2011 at 5:08 am

    In 1962 my husband and I ( newlyweds ) moved into the bunglow next to Dot and Bill. I made a small effort to grow tomatoes and my two (?) plants looked very spindly. One morning I looked out the kitchen window, and wonders of wonders I saw one small bright red tomato tied to a tomato plant …courtesy of my dear neighbours Dorothy and Bill.
    A loving, caring couple I really did not know.
    We moved in 1964 to New Brunswick.
    My thanks to the family and Chandler’s Funeral Home for the video pictures of Dorothy’s life…a dear lady who lived life well, a role model for all women !
    My sincere condolences to her family.
    Anna Cruickshank
    Toronto, On.

  33. Alan Kelso

    May 24, 2011 at 8:56 am

    Growing up in Liverpool I knew the three Killiam boys quite well, Bill, Bucky and Art.. My memory of Dorothy is from the minstral show produced in Liverpool in the late 1940’s. I was a young lad in the orchestra and Dorothy was a fabulous star soloist. I can still visualize her standing on the stage at the Astor Theatre singing the Broadway song “Bill” and it brought down the house. She was a lovely and talented Lady and always so nice to us younger cast members. I remember her well and she will be missed.

  34. Karen Gehue

    May 25, 2011 at 9:07 pm

    Dear Kathryn and family,
    So sorry to hear of your Mother’s passing. She truly was an amazing woman with many many talents. I loved sitting and listening to all her stories and accomplishments in life. She once wrote 2 poems for me that I will always cherish!
    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this most difficult time. “Rest In Peace Dear Dorothy”

    Karen Gehue, CCA
    Region of Queens Home Support

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